it's friday. i'm in love. -the cure-

i love:
this shot. from a wedding sarah was in.


how often my life ::feels:: random.
how rarely it really ::is::.
what we're fondly calling the aunt tax.
free tanning until june.
::really:: good job possibilities.
a ::really:: nice soon-to-be-roommate.
my amazing apartment.
my really genuinely awful awning.
how Jesus works things out.
i mean ::really:: makes things fall together a.maz.ing.ly.
making hair sculptures in the bathtub.
... ::smirk:: with the niece and nephew's hair...
how g.r.e.a.t. the shots of it are going to be.
teddy.
how much my sisters love me.
that i haven't done laundry in ... one. month.
the ::collective gasp::.
sleeping. right. now.

good for the soul.

"where do you go with your broken heart in tow?
what do you do with the left over you?

and how do you know, when to let go?

where does the good go?

look me in the eye and tell me you don't find me attractive.
look me in the heart and tell me you won't go.

look me in the eye and promise no love's like our love.
look me in the heart and unbreak broken ...

it won't happen.

it's love that breaks the seal
of always thinking you would be ...

real...

happy...

healthy...

strong...

and calm.

where does the good go?

where do you go when you're in love and the world knows?

how do you live so happily...

while i am sad and broken down?

what do you say?

it's up for grabs ...
now that you're on your way down?

where does the good go?"

"i've been acting, high and mighty.

it's just the liar here inside me.

it's complicated.

it's so sincere.

i'm saturated from living in here."


"don't see elysium.

don't see no fiery hell.

just the lights up bright baby in the bay hotel.

next wave coming in like an ocean roar.

won't you take my hand darling

on that old dancefloor.

we can twist and shout.

do the turtle dove.

and you're the one i love."


"maybe you were right.

but baby I was lonely.

i don't want to fight.

i'm tired of being sorry."

it's friday. i'm in love. -the cure-

this shot of andrea:


that i have an apartment. with two crazycool girls.
and a matching dog and cat.
in the ukrainian village.
that tomorrow i get to go to shedd aquarium.
maurice sendak's where the wild things are.
alison wearing's honeymoon in purdah.
the wreckers.
particularly leave the pieces.
peter and viv snoring in the next room.
pad thai.
robert earl keen.
being back home in chicago.
hot tea. tazo awake. and twinings earl grey.
good haircuts.
moving soon. so so soon.
that i am well on my way to beginning boundaries.
sleeping on my own airmattress. ha.
that my really real bed will soon be assembled here. hooray!
what a fridaypost cheater i've become. ::smirk::

it's friday. i'm in love. -the cure-

aaand ... i am loving:
this photo by natalie:
and the badass girl ::in:: the photo.



little sisters.
fourwheelers.
wheelies.
cousins.
"you missed a spot."
aunts and uncles.
groundhogs. everywhere these days.
easter sunday morning.
delaware.
patches.
flying with friends. instead of alone.
local numbers to call carin.
the snap. again.
clear thinking.
sleeping. a lot.
coffee and cigarettes.
movies in bed.

"candylions."

i miss this nathanboy a. lot.

soho. 7 march 2006.

this morning i. saw. a. robin!

shrug my shoulders till this day is over.

on the el.

yesterday as i was coming home from thank you for smoking (hi.lar.i.ous. by the by), there was this really young dad and his two little girl daughters on the el with me. he looked supercool, hip and urban and what not ... and was carrying a purple baton. and disciplining the girls. and being crazyfun. and i wanted to be his friend.

there was also this guy playing guitar on the el platform. he was quite good. i mean ... really quite good. i wanted to be his friend too.

i like strangers and their therapeutic smiles.

pat green. tonight.

in Christ alone

it seems like posting lyrics to a song is indeed a fairly cryptic thing to do. but ... on this particular day ... and with these particular words ... it's not even remotely cryptic. it's all of the things i can feel on the clear days. it's all of the things i know and believe to be true even on the fuzzy days. it's all the things i rest in ... when i can remember to rest. it's the way i remind myself. it's the gospel.

in Christ alone my hope is found.
he is my light, my strength, my song.
this Cornerstone, this solid ground,
firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
what heights of love, what depths of peace,
when fears are stilled, when strivings cease .
my Comforter, my All in All.
here in the love of Christ i stand!

in Christ alone, who took on flesh.
fullness of God in helpless babe.
this gift of love and righteousness
scorned by the ones He came to save.
'till on that cross as Jesus died
the wrath of God was satisfied.
for every sin on Him was laid...
here in the death of Christ i live!

there in the ground His body lay.
light of the world by darkness slain.
then bursting forth in glorious Day,
up from the grave He rose again!
and as He stands in victory
sin's curse has lost it's grip on me!
for i am His and He is mine...
bought with the precious blood of Christ!

no guilt in life, no fear in death!
this is the power of Christ in me.
from life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny.
no power of hell, no scheme of man
can ever pluck me from His hand.
'till He returns or calls me home
here in the power of Christ i'll stand!

i. am. finally. here.